Do you really care what other people think of you? How much time do you spend worrying about what others think about you and what you do?
Don’t worry, it’s natural. We’re hardwired to crave acceptance and social approval–it’s in our DNA, after all.
Caring what other people think of you is also what I call ‘unnecessary anxiety’. It’s the anxiety that can be easily avoided if we stop caring about what doesn’t matter. Caring so much about your ‘image’ and feeling a need to be ‘liked’ will ultimately leave you miserable in life. All I’ve ever done is tray and act friendly, if people like me, great. If they don’t, who cares?
No one really cares about what your up to anyway.
There are over 7.9 billion people on this planet right now. Every single one of them has their own unique opinions, beliefs, and contributions to make to this world. No one is the exact same. Not a single person out there who cares about the intricacies of your daily life the way you think they do. That’s the problem with the ego–we all have it, and we all think we’re special enough to occupy someone’s every waking thought. Truth is, that’s just not possible.
Everyone’s more interested in what’s going on in their own lives than in anyone else’s.
Ways to stop caring what other people think:
1. Their Opinion Is Only That — An Opinion
If you want to stop caring about what other think of you, you need to understand first that their opinion of you is only that — an opinion. It does not mean that the rest of the world does not like you or think you’re a ‘great friend’.Part of being a human being is having opinions. People’s opinions of you are not fact, they are not a ‘real thing’ that needs to be worried over. Nobody enjoys being disliked, but to try and relentlessly change someone’s opinion of you is futile.
You can’t please everyone. For some reason, everyone sees themselves as a ‘problem solver’, if someone doesn’t like us, or like what we do, we tirelessly try and fix it.Again, an opinion is not a ‘real thing’, it is a perspective from someone who has a different life to yours.
2. Be True To Yourself
If you care about what other people think too much, chances are you’re not, or you’ve never been true to yourself. You value other people’s opinion too much. You base your every move on what other people will think. I mean why wouldn’t you? When something goes bad you don’t post it on Facebook, when something goes well, you post it over and over on Facebook to prove to fish for compliments. I learnt a long time ago that chasing external compliments is hazardous to your mental wellbeing. If you don’t start complimenting yourself, without the need for an opinion from someone else, I don’t think you can ever be truly content.
External compliments are nice, but they are only external. They don’t mean anything. It’s time to get some self-awareness. If you’re not being true to yourself and what makes you happy, then you can never rely on yourself to back yourself up.
3. Start Respecting Your Own Opinion
Who has real power over you? If you’re a child, your parents have a ton of power over you, that’s just a fact. They might not like you dating a particular person or seeing certain friends. That’s okay, that to me is justified. When you’re an adult, there is not one other person on the planet Earth that has more humanly power than your own opinion. Your opinion is the only one that matters when it comes down to your own life. You are the only one that can take action to do right or wrong, or whatever it is you want to do.
You have to gain a certain amount of respect for your own opinion and actions. If you’re pondering about doing something because you’re worried what someone would say, carefully evaluate the situation, and if it makes sense to you to do it, then just do it. See what happens.
4. Surprise: No One Actually Cares!
As I’ve already said, other people’s opinions are not ‘real things’. More to the point, no one cares! For some reason, when something is happening to someone else, a human being becomes the ‘voice of all reason’. We like to give our opinion in all situations. Maybe we want people to think that we’re smart, or important, the point is we like pushing our ideas out there.
So even though people jump to the chance to give their opinion on you and what you do, deep down, they couldn’t care less. Why? because they’re too busy worrying about what other people think of them too! Their opinion on you is forgotten tomorrow.
5. Just Get Started On Yourself
Some people spend their whole lives trying to keep up an image, just so people like them. Wouldn’t you rather live the life you want, being content within yourself? Trying to keep an image up is exhausting and pointless. You just need to get started on what you want out of life. If you want to be a DJ, just go and start doing something that will contribute to that! Forget what your friends think, just because they don’t want to DJ, doesn’t mean that you’re wrong. You might have to sleep on their couch until you get yourself up and running, but if that’s what you want to do just keep plugging away.
6. Put Yourself Out There
The best way to top caring what other people think is to just put yourself out there. Some of my opinions here might be controversial, but nevertheless, I don’t care, because again, they are just my opinion. I started writing about mental health because I wanted to empower others and to help them realize that they are not alone in the way they feel. If you’ve got something that you want to do, just put yourself out there. These days you can easily start a blog, a vlog, or a podcast. Once you get some good and bad feedback (which you ultimately will) you can start to understand that it doesn’t matter what people think because they’ll always be some people who like what you do, and some others that don’t. Being hung up on the bad feedback is pointless because it’s always balanced with the good.
7. Educate Yourself
One of the biggest reasons that you care what other people think of you is because you feel inadequate. The only way to counter that is to educate yourself. Maybe you’re overly conscious of yourself and what you have to offer others. Whilst it shouldn’t matter what you can offer them, educating yourself can help you gain more confidence. Take it upon yourself to learn a new skill or two. This could be anything — web design, baking, crafting — the options are endless. By gaining a new set of skills you, can dramatically increase your self-esteem and how you feel about yourself. An easy way to gain new skills is to turn to the internet. You can read books, watch videos, or listen to audiobooks.
If you’re not trying to start online profile, just start what you want to do. The happiest people I know are the ones that just go and do what they want without needing the approval of others. They don’t post what they’re doing online, they just do it.
Live your best life without caring so much what others think. GOOD LUCK